This entry is part 5 of 7 in the series At Deaths Drawer

Hand in the drawer, as it had been so many times before, even before the thoughts if moderation faded from his forebrain, his fingers uncontrolled and untempered by such thoughts, picked out 2, then 3, then 4 and more. He might have taken a handful if not interupted by the soft touch of Sarah’s hand on the back oh his own. The pills fell to scatter beneath the bed, where so many others lie discarded, lost and forgotten.

 

The unreal world he just recovered from felt more real then her touch on his hand. Sarah had walked out on him nearly 4 years ago, or was it over 6? That was the event that triggered his downward spiral. “Sarah, are you really here? This makes no sense, you can’t be here, this can’t be real” the “When had you last been living?” Still echoing within the confines of his skull. The duck had also asked, “Why have you squandered my gifts to you?” Sarah had been his only gift, as well as his greatest curse. The only woman to care for him, despite how teribly he had treated her. When she left him, he too left himself.

 

Squandered… That was the word he heard. To waste in a reckless or foolish manner,or to allow through actions or innaction to become lost. Sarah was the only thing he ever valued, the only thing he ever had to lose. Surely the diety of his delerium must be refering to her? And now, shes here?

 

“I don’t understand” he sobbed, “I’m so so sorry, I know how much I hurt you”

“Shhh” she pressed a finger to his lips, “you’re weak, I heard you screamming through the door, but you had stopped breathing by the time I reached you.” He shuddered, “I..I.. I died?” A tear dropped from her eye to his. He gulped, and blinked, and slammed the drawer shut in disgust.

 

Sarah, her breath still lingering in the recesses of his lungs. But would her return bring new life, or unsurmountable destruction. Only time would tell. But at least he had one more momment snatched from the edge of the abyss.

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